Matt was conceived on the 3rd November 2003, on Roy’s birthday, when he finally caved in after years of begging from me, a relentless nagger.
I yearned to be a mommy, after having to leave my girls in Nelspruit, and after begging the Lord, and making a deal with him, I was finally pregnant.
Just to feel him kicking and moving inside me was the absolute joy any expecting mom could experience.
He was born almost 4 weeks prem on the 9th July 2004, to my heart’s content and with an apgar of 10/10 on his first test. He was destined to be a genius. Dr Colin Derrick could not stop saying what an absolutely beautiful child he was. Amen, because that he was.
He changed mine and Roy’s life’s forever and so after a promise to God for giving me Matt, so started a journey with Christ that gathered the whole family together in service here at Musgrave.
One morning Matthew was pretend playing, I was in the shower and he came and collected the pretend car keys from me, sat down with his back to the cupboards and started his car and said “come mommy”, “where we going” I said. He replied “to church”.
Matthew was a happy, loving, joyful, high spirited little boy and Roy and I were his absolute heroes. We spent hours playing with him and entertaining him.
He was also very accident prone and after so many injuries, a burn, two falls and an accident off his black bike at school, we believed he was a tough little fighter. He never complained of being hurt and when he cried it was usually forgotten and over in minutes.
I say this, and not because I am a proud mommy, but because deep within me I know he was loved by all his peers, he was gentle and kind and caring and played so beautifully with all his friends. Christopher was his ultimate true mate, best buddy, and little tiger. Jamie was his best mate too. He had a different kind of manner with each, but each unique to their personalities.
He idolized his little sisters Jade and Amber. He knew Jade would do anything for him, like a big sister and Amber, well who better to cause coukarakis with.
His big brother Dev was his hero, he would play ball with Dev every opportunity he had and he even told me Dev had a basketball and it bounced boing boing.
His best cuz, Sazy pez and him spent many wonderful family holidays together, playing on the beach, and Brucy and Chuch were a very big part of his life from when he was born.
He was truly loved by everyone; he just had the knack of crawling deep into everybody’s heart.
When I found out Matt had Leukaemia, we were in the hospital and he was asleep, I went through to the bathroom to have a bath and I collapsed on the floor, I wept and wept, the ugliest cry you could imagine. When I sat down next to him after my bath, I prayed to God in my head and I said Lord if it is his time, take him now, like Abraham was willing to give up his son, take him quickly and don’t let him suffer. Matt then rolled over in his sleep and touched my leg, and in his sleep said, “I am holding on”
Our sovereign almighty Father, Abba, does not promise a life here on earth without pain or loss, but He remains faithful in that He promises to always be with us and share our pain.
I am so glad I had four weeks, where I spent every possible waking hour playing with him and telling him that I loved him. At night when we were asleep in the hospital bed he kept waking and asking me to hold his hand, and I held his little hand as softly as I could always aware of the fact that I did not want to hurt him.
On Saturday night, 3am he asked me to make him some Milo, after I had got back into bed and he had finished drinking it, he rolled over onto my pillow, put his little hand in the cradle of my neck and said, “I love you my mommy, and I love my daddy too”
He was and will always be the apple of my eye. I love him more than life itself and he will remain in my heart and in my purpose for the length of my life.
Heavenly Father, my little boy is now with you in the most perfect place in all of eternity, Lord I pray that you cradle him and keep telling him that he is a good boy and loved with so much compassion and true delight that his star will always shine bright.